Saturday, May 3, 2008

The Conflict of the Ninjas and the Leprechauns

For a million zillion years now, ninjas and leprechauns have been the ultimate rivals. Leprechauns have waved their little canes around at Ninjas, whilst the Ninjas smack the irish goldmongering midgets in the head with their Nunchaku. The story of why they are so aggresive towards each other has finally been revealed by the leprechaun leader Seamus McHoolihan O'Reilly against the will of the Ninja leader Ninj. The Legend goes as such.
In the ancient times, Japan and Ireland were sausage-linked to each other with real Italian Sausages. The Leprechauns and Ninjas lived happily together in harmony. The Ninjas assassinated anyone the Leprechauns wanted dead and the Leprechauns providing the Ninjas with gold to make their kick-awesome Nunchaku. It was the circle of life. Or death. Or whatever the heck you wanna call it. So anyway, Ninj and Seamus were the bestest of friends. One day as they sat together watching the golden sun set, Seamus asked if him and Ninj would be friends forever. "The Foreverest" said Ninj, the words not synced to his mouth.
The next day Ninj woke up to go get his nunchaku from his secret fortress, but they were gone. Ninj knew that the only person who knew were they were hidden was Seamus, so he went to seamus's house. Seamus opened the door and the stereotypical smell of irish food cooking wafted out the door. Ninj smacked him in the head and ran way. Seamus took this seriously, so he got mad and ripped the tender sausage links that held Japan and Ireland together apart, and they drifted away.
That is how ninjas and leprechauns became enemies.

Thursday, May 1, 2008

Dentists...

So i had to go to the dentist 2 days in a row this week to get some fillin's. As cool as my dentist is, I hate going to the dentist... they drill into you with their evil intsruments borrowed from SATAN. They had to numb up my mouth both times, and that stuff bugs the crap out of me with it's "Numb up yo mouf UP for like 5 friggin' hours" action. I've always loved how the dentists just sit there and concentrate more on their conversation with each other than the actual dentist...ing.
"So how was your day?"
"Good, I went to my kid's play"
"Oh, Keith?"
"No, Kyle"
"Oh. How's Keith doing?"
"Good"
"Good"
I kept half expecting to hear something like,
"Oh my gosh, look at his ear!"
"What th- How did the drill get by his ear???"
Going to the dentist sucks...
In other news, my friends get mad at me when I use proper English and punctuation when text messaging. It's just instinct. Good night.